The Weight of the Word FAT.

At the age of thirty....something and a fat girl to the core I've gotten used to the snide comments people like to make. I've been a big butt since I was a little girl and there isn't anything that can be said to me that hasn't been said in the past. When one is ridiculed for the their appearance at such a young age it's nearly impossible for little girls to not hide behind bricks and avoid the pain that words carry. I thought this sort of pain was behind me, the other day I found out I was wrong.

See, I've been busting my ass in the gym for nearly 6 months. I've lost a total of 30 lbs and two sizes and I've been feeling pretty good about myself. I suppose maybe too good because one of the few assholes that I work with decided I needed to be slammed back into low self-esteem town. I guess he thought I should have made more progress or that my thighs were still too fat. Whatever the case, he'd done what he set out to do.

Stunned that someone of our age and current location (at work) would make such a rude comment, I sat and thought about what needed to be done. My first instinct was to march down stairs and blacken both his eyes. The frail little half-wit deserved a good ass kicking with an audience of on lookers wondering what just took place. But I side with my better judgement and decide to bring it to the attention of his supervisor. Normally, this sort of shit wouldn't get a rise out of me but this asshole is looking for a fight. He constantly insults and belittles people, walking off with a smirk like he's just please as pie with himself. Who the fuck does this guy think he is?

I'll tell you who he is, he's a old man who works in inventory, probably hasn't see the vagina in eons, picks his nose and eats his boogers, plays with toy cars and boats, and thinks that his shit doesn't stink.  And, AND he used to be fat. You'd think that if anybody understands how one feels being overweight it would be him. Apparently former fat people become just as heartless as current non-fat people, thinking they have a right to judge and ridicule.

In the end he got reprimanded for harassment. I didn't use that word, his supervisor did and I was stunned that in his own defense when confronted about it he responded that he was "shocked". Shocked? By what? The fact that what he said offended me or that I put an end to his reign of bullshit. Would he be just as shocked if I called him a faggot? Should I then pretend I was unaware that that word would offend anyone? I suppose the whole purpose of me letting someone know what the douche bag was up to has worked out. I just hope that he understands the weight hateful words carry to those of us who's self esteem has been battered for many years.